SHOW REVIEW

ROCK N ROLL WEEKEND PART 1
BIG BOBBY & THE NIGHT CAPS, THE HYDEOUTS, THE LOOKERS, & THE MALAMONDOS
@ BAR NONE, VA BEECH
APRIL 17, 2009
Attended by yours truly Mz. H

Wow, needless to say I was worried about the coolness of this due to the fact that this show was booked at a new bar located in an industrial park on Cleveland Street just a stone throws away from Pembroke's Town Center. Also, to say I was a little biased as to who I really wanted to see would also be an understatement - I have watched and observed as The Lookers have come into their own since rising from the ashes of their previous incarnation as The Abscondents aka "The Lords of Shitrock". Also - I love each and every time I see The Night Caps - my number one fave local outfit. I had high hopes and I am fairly sure they were all met on this night! J Bird picked us (G Wiz & I) up in his futuristic voice activated Ford Focus and away we went to this strange place that I hoped wouldn't be filled with strange people.

So, apparently Nice Man Dave Allison has been booking shit at Bar None. You may know Dave from previous local endeavors such as many shews booked at the Blue Plate in Norfuck, running his label / distro Amendment Records, or from his band Facade Burned Black. I know Dave because he's a nice motherfucker - he's a real sweetie! I like me some Dave! So we pull into the lot and enter to see Allison in his infamous Shemps shirt, being nice as usual - automatic guest list for me complete with a wristband that read "PARTY TIME!" and a drink ticket good for a freebie from the bar. Thanks Dave! It was early - 9 PM - and we waited for awhile before The Malamondos would start. I started to try to drink a PBR but felt like shit and only drank half the can - I seriously considered a sober evening briefly. The Malamondos hail from Greenville, NC and were the first band to kick start the night.

Good times were underway after the show started - The Malamondos play kinda surfy - garagey rock with a chick singer. The best part of their set was the great go go dancer they had - mad props to the leggy blonde they had shimmying up a storm for em. People were a little restrained when they played - no crazy dancing from the notorious local girly gang for this band which was a shame. Then my girl Casey showed up and was like "Hey, do you want a beer?", and I was like "Well, okay...". That was the beginning of the end for me. I had fun the whole rest of the night. I liked the first band - even though the drummer wore a kilt. I have issues with kilts - like why do people wear them publicly and usually they don't wear underdraws with em which is gross to me - commando is not the way for me! It just seems like a selfish thing to me to push the kilt and no underdraws on folks...yuck. Anywho - I had some fun fun fun - they played a cover of "Have Love - Will Travel" which I really enjoyed.

Everyone was getting fucked the hell up at this point - I tasted Hydeout Mark's bourbon n coke to see how it really was at the bar - and man wuz that shit STRONG! So - that explains why folks were getting fucked the hell up all around me. I saw another buddy jOhn a. not too far from the door - a rare treat for those in the know. He gave me his drink ticket and man was I grateful! I used it later for obvious dubious purposes. After a little chit chat, The Lookers started their set for the night. Personally, I think I'd say they stole the shew - which is amazing considering how sick J Bird wuz - cellulitous was the diagnosis last weekend and the caution flag went out - I was very thrilled with how J managed to pull thru shit - a rare true frontman! The joint wuz PACKED for them - and everybody went BUCK for em. The Lookers are kinda like riff driven r'n'r - a cross between the Sonics, Chuck Berry, and the Angry Samoans. They are kinda still finding themselves and I think they have a lot of potential - and I am not just saying that because Drummer G Wiz n I are BMFF, or becuse I am BFF's with other members J Bird (vox), Alex (gits), A - Dam (bass), n Mr. Stephen (gits as well). I have watched them pull together and create a beautiful thing in their band - I am proud of them. And man lemme tell ya - mad dancing and shimmying from the crowd! It got hot as hell in the joint - lots of laughing and partying and good vibes all around. And believe me - it's good to have something to believe here in this shitty ass scene and I think people really are hungry for something genuinely good and The Lookers are providing right now.

Next wuz more friends - The Hydeouts. They have also evolved some in their time together. Already established is the fact that guitarist Mark wuz sipping leathal brown liquor drinks - woo wee. I love me some Mark! So they started their set and they were kick ass as well - I LOVE LOVE LOVE J Sin's SCREAM - "OOOOOWWWWWWWW!". They are kinda more on a little bit slower, garagey, metaly tip - yet very angular and a tad arty to me, but don't be weirded out by that. I like me some HYDEOUTS - covas of "Won't U Tell Me" and "Halloween" - good times all around. J - Sin is a great front man as well - Iggy meets Gerry Rosalie and if you're smart you can figure it all out. I was getting fucked the hell up at this point - shots were being offered and I was like "Fuck it - I ain't driving, why should I deny myself?".

The bathrooms sucked ass. The ladiez room had THE ugliest flower "arrangement" sitting on the counter - I tried to throw it away in a drunken fit but it didn't fit in the trash can. The stupid painting they had on the wall kept falling down - it's like "Shit - I gotta piss why the fuck do you want me to waste time re hanging your ugly ass painting?!". Then you look down and see the ugly ass flower arrangement and you are like "Fuck - nothing but tackyness all around. God bless Virginia Beach!". Where were the fucking lighthouse / fishing pictures?!

Finally jesus fucking christ The Night Caps started. This line up included of course Big Fucking Bobby on bass, Scotto Blotto on gits (of Halfways n Dirty Fingers fame), and J LOW as in Josh mother fuckin Lowry on drums (from Dirty Fingers / Hillbilly Werewolf fame and I use the term "fame" loosely Scotto n J LO). This was a strange night for me and The Night Caps - they played a buncha new shit I didn't know - good shit but WTF Bobby? I know, sometimes it's time to move on but wow - how abrupt! They were fucking awesome anyhow - I love Lowry's lefty drum style - and Scotto has really grown as a player over the years - bad ass are the exact words I am looking for. AND it was a short ass set - they were done by 1:15 or something...next time Bobby you better commit to at least a half hour - and personally that's not even enough time for me. I'll be at your SHED ROCK fest in May - wearing bells.

So then we sorta hung around for a while - talked with Bobby's wife Kim (such a sweet gal), just totally drunk - EVERYONE WAS FUCKED THE HELL UP! TGIF was the battle call for many this evening - and good times was had by all.